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Pronunciation: 'li-m&-rik, 'lim-rik
Function: noun
Etymology: Limerick, Ireland
: a light or humorous verse form of 5 chiefly anapestic verses of which lines 1, 2, and 5 are of 3 feet and lines 3 and 4 are of 2 feet with a rhyme scheme of aabba.

Help write a limerick by adding a line below.

Not sure of the meter? Sing the limerick to the tune of Hickory Dickory Dock and see if it flows correctly.

Contributions that do not have the correct meter or rhyme will be removed — in a kind and caring fashion, of course. :-)

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Archive (latest 50 limericks) 

Letter p        (Anon.)
Stew        (Anon.)
pew        (Anon.)
wew        (Anon.)
There once was a cat named dog        (Anon.)

Vorty Finn        (Anon.)
Was too thin        (Anon.)
so he could have been big        (jo momma)
fuck        (Anon.)
There once was a girl from Klemzig        (Anon.)

There once was a boy named Fat        (Jo)
Who thought he was really all that        (Anon.)
Basketball and golf        (Anon.)
Hawks make me ralf        (Anon.)
Happy birthday old man and all dat!        (Anon.)

There once was a fellow called Matt        (Matt)
My pussy is o big. My penis is to big. Just f@ck me. Im gay.        (Anon.)
I like to eat ass        (Jodie Appleton )
we'll have dinner at hugos        (doll)
Big asshole        (Matt)

who shall eat this bung bung        (Anon.)
?mnbvfcdfvgbhuytvfcder        (szdxfc)
I can't stop licknig        (Mani)
Sex        (Smail)
There once was a young lad named Ahmed        (Anon.)

There was once was a girl named Lizzie        (Lizzie)
Who always sucked big cockies        (Brian)
You might think I would say        (Anon.)
You can come for the play        (Anon.)
butt my pizza is ready        (john)

wergth        (Anon.)
1234        (Anon.)
ok        (Anon.)
ok        (Anon.)
suck it        (cola)

there once was a young man called        (mark)
dog called rusty        (Anon.)
yolo        (Anon.)
yolo        (Anon.)
hi        (hi)

Winston house is the bestest        (Anon.)
Yo bitch STFU        (Anon.)
Titfnhj        (Anon.)
there once was a girl named        (Lisa)
There once was a girl named Kerri        (Anon.)

There was a dog from Frisco Bay        (kareemisstupid)
He said, hey BAE BAE..... BAE BAE BAE        (very stupid)
But he never found his soul mate        (andugly)
Nor his pile of money I left him before he went to college and I was like why are you wasting time        (and sexy)
So he took the train with no pay        (ewno)

My pussy smells like fanta        (hehe puuuuusssssy)
And it's so big it fits Santa        (ikindawanttowatchbringiton)
I werk I twerk I dip it and ferk        (666666666)
I can no longer stand this banta        (boston)
no        (stop)

There was a young hippy named Mary        (twerqANDwerq)
Who was quite the contrary        (werqANDtwerq)
She sold out and bought Starbucks        (ANDwerqtwerq)
But bitch starbucks sucks, get philz        (anananananad)

Werk Werk Werk Werk Werk        (yeah I said it)
I'm a tall and loud man named Dyrk        (my pussy? not my pussy)
I fart and scream        (pusssssssssssssssy)
And I'll cover you with my cream        (smallpenisman)
Jack me off and watch me eeeeeeeem        (lalallaallalaaa)

You must be a young lady called sue        (Anon.)
isqsqsdewfdu        (dh)
Your cunt is leaking blood        (Anon)
Ew ew ew ew ew ew a flood        (yeah I said it)
The townspeople had to start anew        (YAAAAAS)

There once was a cat named Patch        (Anon.)
He loved to open the latch        (Jamye)
black guy        (f)
Is gonna die        (animu)
But Patch is the one that feels bad        (Kar)

That's what the place means to us        (Eishtec)
Cape tOWN        (DARRYN)
in Africa        (Ebola)
ate a pussy        (ass)
Thats what the place means to us        (Sibo)

There once was a young Black Sox called        (Rolt)
ok        (Jopez)
dairy queen        (Anon.)
too small for you        (finn)
yes        (liny)

There once was a king named Haile Selassie        (Jha)
robin        (robin)
Who was as dumb as a rock        (Jeanie)
there once was a girl called Lisa        (Anon.)
who is interesting and complicated        (Libby )

My mom the one i love        (Anon.)
There was an old teacher from Peru        (Anon.)
there was a lady named crystal        (Anon.)
a now yu know what to do        (e)
he even ate it with jam        (Anon.)

There once was a number named one        (Anon.)
We use it in math. it's fun        (Anon.)
We use one all the time        (Anon.)
love the way you smell        (Anon.)
you smell like flower        (Anon.)

jeff        (Anon.)
Riley and Monkey sitting in the tree        (Anon.)
panda        (john)
honda        (Anon)
me        (Anon.)

There once was a man named        (Guy)
Eric        (Anon.)
Down he goes, down down        (AT&T boy)
very low        (Drew)
there once was a boy named        (John)

Zoe is 8 today        (Anon.)
So I made Zoe a soufflé        (Anon.)
To put in her pussay        (Anon.)
But it grew to puffey        (sam)
eishtec        (Anon.)

We've got her for marketing communication        (oz)
There was a young girl called        (Rebecca)
sam        (sammy)
colin        (Anon.)
There once was a man named Kennet        (Alex)

there was once a young man called rick        (dick)
who is alway a bit of a dick        (Anon.)
He'd scream and he'd yell        (Edward)
And raise holy hell        (Nick)
And beat himself off with a stick        (Anon.)

Hickory Dickory Dock        (Fagballs McGee)
My cock is as big as a clock        (Nig Nog)
Go away he said        (Alis)
OMFG        (Anon.)
jgjg        (Anon.)

There once was a fag called m00t        (OP)
who gave his kingdom up to SJW mods        (popckorn)
by sheer greed and ambition        (4chon)
he sucked jew cut cock        (Anon.)
This isn't how you limerick you fags        (Anon.)

There once was a man called        (Jon Olsen )
The horse he had was big balled        (4chan)
high        (Sri)
marry        (harry)
Down's Syndrome        (Nigger)

There once was a boy in Ireland        (Nick)
Theirs was a girl called        (Vera)
Vera, that doesn't even fucking rhyme        (Nick)
There was a birthday girl called        (Barbara)
None of you know how to rhyme, what the fuck        (Nick)

There was a boy named Tom        (Anjela)
he lived someplace near llansilin        (Gwil)
Behind the TV        (Anon.)
there was a young person named sarah        (Anon.)
And my penis is Tom        (Cock)

There was a young man from spain        (Pedro)
And Pedro was his name        (Anon.)
He flew home with his wife        (Anon.)
But soon lost his life        (Anon.)
When the wings fell off the plane        (Anon.)

There was once a girl called Sara Jo        (Anony-mouse)
there once was a boy called        (josh)
who had an enormous lassoo        (bassoo)
there once was a boy called conor        (Anon.)
There a boy called        (Brian)

I once met a lady from Greece        (Anon.)
there was once a boy called henrick        (Anon.)
vince        (Anon.)
there once was a man called vnce        (Anon.)
there was once a man called vince        (dawnie)

There once was a boy called Freddie        (Anon.)
who was as sweet and cuddly as a teddy        (Anon.)
One Christmas Day        (Anon.)
Had to say I love you        (Blue)
alpaca        (3)

the 1930s were dreary        (Anon.)
the 1920s were cheery\        (Anon.)
the people made money in the 1920s        (Anon.)
he was a geordie        (Alex)
Freddie        (Anon.)

There once was a young man named Steve        (Anon.)
Who had a gloriously long weave        (Anon.)
Until one day        (Anon.)
He had a Cafe Au Lait        (Anon.)
His weave felt underachieved        (Anon.)

there once was a boy named shamir        (Anon.)
who didn't care much for christmas cheer        (Anon.)
but then brendan rodgers got sacked        (Anon.)
And then Sony got hacked        (Anon.)
there once was a young man named steve        (Anon.)

There once was a girl named kara        (Rainmake)
Roi with his toy, Oboy        (Anon.)
Who pissed all over the ceiling        (Ealing )
What shall we ever do        (kyla)
this sucks        (tbh)

there once was a girl called        (gemma)
poop        (Anon.)
There once was a man named        (albert)
mark        (Anon.)
who named their child stain        (Rainmake)

there once was a girl named cienna        (Anon.)
Who once took a trip to vienna        (Anon.)
time        (Anon.)
their was        (fernando)
there once was a girl named        (rebecca)

sorry for this guys        (Anon.)
my friend is on my phone        (Anon.)
i hope you guys can forgive me        (Anon.)
because this is a really cool site        (Anon.)
really sorry        (,))

Shaun Walsh        (Walshy)
Joby Norton        (Nurse Joby)
emmy        (emmy)
To a creative friend        (Kipps )
shut up        (Anon.)

There once was an elf called        (Jingle)
FUCK YOU JINGLE!        (Anon.)
JE MOEDER!        (condoomanoniem.nl)
For sex call 911!        (The police FREEZE MOTHERFUCKERS!)
come on guys grow up and btw this is the best limmerick ever!        (Anon.)

hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahaha        (Anon.)
hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahaha        (Anon.)
hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahaha        (Anon.)
hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahaha        (Anon.)
hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahaha        (Anon.)

wat denken jij!        (Anon.)
gs        (sg)
jpwd i;shufsghdfguiobs        (Anon.)
wat denken jij!        (Anon.)
wat denken jij!        (Anon.)

jij niet weet        (your mother)
wat nou weer houd je bek nou eens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!        (Anon.)
wat denken jij!!!        (dani de mogool)
nou eigenlihk wejqbest wek;l eveevewklsflel        (Anon.)
rjkwqednaskldkjakldsakdlsadjlasdjkaosjpqdjoefnsoifho[sd'fksdnmvjkodfhpdofjsdklht0eoi        (Anon.)

je moeder        (sjakalala)
hahaha        (lol)
nee dani        (je nmoeder)
houd je bek samuel        (Anon.)
wat denken jij!        (Anon.)

Halo wie ben je?        (Niemand weet zijn naam?)
hhaahhahahahaha        (Anon.)
jpwd i;shufsghdfguiobs        (Anon.)
asdsadsadasd        (Anon.)
dsadadsaada        (Anon.)

er was eens een man aan het pissen        (dannydedani)
die zat me toch echt weet te dissen        (dannydedani)
maar ja wat kan ik toch nou aan doen        (dannydedani)
want hij heette otch echt weer koen        (dannydedani)
houd je bek je weet niet wie ik ben!        (man met schnor)

max was zo klein dik en lelijk        (zijn moeder)
hij wist niet wat hij moest doen om maud te zoenen        (max)
majv        (rwettw5)
rytbwuynet        (nuyenuyneu)
jouw        (hoofd)

There once was a chick at UHC        (Anon.)
there once was a fellow named        (andrew)
when bored sarcasm he threw        (Anon.)
jij weet niet wie ik ben        (je moeder)
whahahouwwwww        (klaas Fack)

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